My Famous Stuffing

Hello out there!
YAY, I managed to only go a month this time before posting again. I'm gonna do once a month for a while I think, and when I get into that habit, maybe I can start adding more posts. We are now entering the holiday season, and therefore I thought it was high time to share my #1 secret holiday recipe. So, I'm not one to brag, but my friends tell me that I make the best stuffing ever. I would never say that myself, except that my friends have said so. So I'm only saying what I've heard from my friends.(Emma, anyone?) Anyways. I took these pictures two Thanksgivings ago, and now am finally using them. I hope it works in the written form. I always just eyeball stuff, so it's hard for me to put the recipe down on paper. Ok, here we go.



Step 1: The base of your stuffing is apples, onions and Pepperidge Farm Herb Seasoned Stuffing.
Coarsely chop 4 apples, 2 medium onions and buy yourself a bag of stuffing.

Step 2: chop several stocks of celery, though I don't always use celery in my stuffing. Those happen to be my grandmother's beautiful hands chopping my celery for me. I won't get to see her this Thanksgiving or Christmas, which will be the first time in several years. 

Step 3: Place onions apples and celery in a large skillet on medium/high heat with a little olive or grapeseed oil. Have another skillet prepared because once you add the stuffing, you may need to split it between two pans.

Step 4: Meanwhile, moisten half the bag of herb stuffing with some water. It will take about 2 cups or more to really get all of it wet.

Step 5: Go back and check on your pan!!! Quick! Oh ok, its doing great. When the onions start getting translucent, add the moist stuffing to the pan. The picture on the bottom is post-stuffing. At this point you may have to split it between two pans. Turn the heat down to medium. Continue to stir.

Step 6: Now comes the delicious part. Pour half a pint of REAL HEAVY WHIPPING CREAM over the top of the pan full of stuffing. Go ahead, just DO it! Mix it in to the stuffing, and turn the heat off.

Step 7: Sprinkle generously with salt, ground Thyme, Garlic powder, Dill, Poultry Seasoning, just whatever good herbs you have on hand. Then give it a little dash of nutmeg.

Make this your own! I decided to add a little dollop of fig preserves to mix things up a little

Step 8: After all those luscious herbs are mixed in and the house smells heavenly, pour the mixture into two medium sized casserole dishes. Press into the dish. Wow, i'm getting hungry for some right now! 

 Step 9: Now, the final touches! Take about 2 1/2 cups of water and put it in a small pot. Add 1 packed cup of brown sugar and 1 1/2 cups of pecans and bring to a boil. After boiling for about 5 minutes or so, add 2 big tablespoons of cornstarch mixed with a little water. Bring to a boil until it starts to thicken. Remove from heat.

 Step 10: FINAL STEP PEOPLE! Pour the caramelized pecans over the top of your stuffing. Admire it, smell it, sigh deeply with satisfaction. Now, place those casseroles into a 350 degree oven for 15 minutes. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the best stuffing you'll ever eat, so my friends say.

My mother insisted that we take a picture with me holding the final product. Looking at this picture has just made me homesick. I will miss Christmas at home this year, but I must say that I am excited to have my family here in my new home. 

Well, I certainly hope it turns  out for you, and if not, shoot me an email or a comment with your questions and I'll try to help you out. I hope everyone has a blessed Thanksgiving, and I'll be back with some more holiday posts. Blessings! ~ Maria Goff. 

Best Stuffing Ever

4 apples coarsly chopped
2 medium onions diced
1/2-3/4 bag of Pepperidge farm herbed stuffing
1 cup of chopped celery(optional)
2-3 TBS of olive or grapeseed oil
1/2 pint of heavy whipping cream
Salt to taste
Garlic power, thyme, other herbs to taste
Dash of nutmeg
1 1/2 cups of pecan halves
2 1/2 cups of water
1 packed c of brown sugar
2 TBS corn starch

Directions:

1. Place apples, onions and celery in a large skillet with olive oil and sautee on medium-high heat until onions are translucent
2. Moisten half the bag of stuffing with 2ish cups of water, and add to the skillet. Continue to cook while stirring the stuffing in. You may have to split between two skillets. 
3. Pour half a pint of whipping cream over the top of the stuffing and heat  while stirring a few minutes longer. Add salt and herbs and remove from heat. 
4. Pour into two casserole dishes and press into the dishes. 
5. Bring 2 1/2 cups of water to a boil, add pecan halves. Boil for 5 minutes.
6. Mix cornstarch with a little water and add to pecans. Continue to boil until thickened. Pour over casseroles. 
7. Bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes or until hot through. Enjoy!

We Made It!

September. The official first month of my favorite season, the bane of school children, and the month that everything changed.

When I say that everything changed, I don't mean that almost everything changed, or that it was a big change in my life, but no big deal, no I mean quite literally that absolutely everything in my life changed. I'm telling you, NOTHING about Texas is the same as North Carolina, especially the BBQ.

Now as I reach the one year mark, I wanted to take some time and reflect upon my first year of married life. 

First of all, I still miss home. In fact, I think I miss it more now than I did when I first moved here. I miss it more now, because looking back on the year I can see how uninvolved I am now in my parents lives, my brothers and my best friend's life. I miss it more now, because I can appreciate now what I had because I no longer have it. I think I will always miss home. I'm just a sentimental person, and our family is so close, it is hard to realize that their lives are no longer a part of mine. It's part of life though isn't it? I have to leave my family and cleave to my husband as we form our own home and our own family.

Our own family. That has been the biggest struggle of this year. My husband and I have hit the one year mark of our marriage, and the dreaded one year without conception mark. It is painful, even now, to think about it, and to write about it. Never did I think that I would ever face this predicament. God has seen us through. I have had some very sad days, and a very heavy heart, but still God is good. He has a reason for withholding conception, and we just have to trust Him completely.

I have learned many lessons this year, through this trial, but also just in general:

Lesson 1: 

 I have learned, this year, that trusting, hoping, and having faith does not necessarily mean happiness. I can trust, and have faith, and still be sad, still ache, still long and yearn. If I let those emotions turn into anger, bitterness, and cynicism, then my heart is sinful.

OH! How I want a child of my own! But OH, how much more I want God. Sometimes it's the most painful things in your life that drive you to Him.

Lesson 2:
Never have I seen how much I need Him more than I have this year. Never have I so often faced my weaknesses and my sins.

And the more clearly you can see the depths of your sin, the more clearly you will see the glory in the cross! 

Lesson 3:

I have learned this year just how selfish I can be, and just how ungrateful I can be. Gratefulness is and contentedness were hard lessons to learn. But not so hard when you see what wonderful blessings you have. Speaking of blessings....my sister and her husband and their children.

Blessings:

Living down the street from Evangeline has been just a blessing and a gift. God knew I would need some family to get me through the loneliness of moving to a new town and marrying my complete opposite. He knew I would need children, almost like my own, to comfort me through the difficulties of infertility. He knows all my needs, and how graciously He has provided. I have enjoyed my sister and her children so very much, and it has been the perfect comfort for me through some hard times.

My quiet time has been so important. I am so thankful that we have had a solid routine this year and that together we were able to read through the entire Bible. I could not persevere through change, conflict, and waiting without God's word reminding me that He is good, He is faithful, He loves me, and He is ENOUGH.

My husband is the greatest blessing of all. He is patient, so so patient. He is kind and understanding. He is tender. He has been there to listen, to hold me, to scratch my back in the middle of the night and to correct my bad behavior and praise the good. He has challenged me, and he has not coddled me in my sin. He has had high expectations of me and has made me see Christ more clearly. 

If I have learned anything this year, it's that my husband is an ever present, tangible reminder of the gospel. The more I get to know him, the more I am assured that I not only married the right person, but was given a gift beyond all expectations, that I can never deserve. He may be quiet and understated, but he has more passion for the gospel than anyone I've ever known. And so I celebrate. I celebrate the day that this amazing man kissed me on the lips for the first time, and made me his own. How proud I am to be his. How glad I am to belong. How blessed I am to spend my life serving Bruce.

I leave you with one piece of advice to engaged or newlywed girls:
TAKE ALL THOSE SILLY EXPECTATIONS INGRAINED INTO YOUR PSYCHE BY ROMANTIC BOOKS AND MOVIES AND THROW THEM IN THE GARBAGE! He's not going to read you poetry by firelight or save your life in the rain, but he will take out the trash, and he will stay up at night and listen to you, and he will hold you while you cry, and he will dance with you even when everything in him loathes it. Being married is the best. Enjoy it!

The Waiting Game

Every woman, every person rather, has their little hopes and expectations. One woman waits for the perfect beau, the other for a black gown and mortar board cap. Some dream of adventures in foreign lands, still others of comforting the cries of orphans.

My dreams and expectations seem to change quite a bit from year to year, though there have been some that have stayed constant. At one time in my life I thought i'd be a famous  writer. Some time later, I thought I would be a missionary in the third world, caring for orphans most likely. I thought I might be a teacher and someday a wife. I longed to be a wife. The amount of time that I waited for this in my life seems like forever. I feel like I waited more than half my life for that day in September. I'm a wife now. I find myself living the dreams I once had of keeping house and taking care of a dear man. It was worth the wait, and now the waiting is done. Right?

WRONG.

There is another dream I have; one that I have carried with me as long as I carried my dream of wifehood. my dream of motherhood. I've been taking care of other peoples children since I was thirteen, and have loved every minute. Now I am married and my arms ache for one who resembles me and my love. I yearn for a wee one who belongs to me and comes from my own flesh.  I took it for granted that my own would just come along right away. I assumed that three our four months into marriage I'd find myself "with child." Not so. Here I am 8 months later, looking for every excuse I can find for why I'm still barren.

    "Bruce was on antibiotics for a while, that probably didn't help." "I wasn't really tracking very well the first    

    few months." "Well i'm a very small woman, maybe that has to do with it." "Some people just take this   

    long." 

Suddenly as I find myself facing that time of the month again, I find that there are no more excuses. It seems painfully clear that God simply does not will us to have children right now. The question cowering in the back of my brain, trembling and to scared to even materialize itself is, will it EVER be His will?

 Bruce was not sick this month. It was a textbook month for us. So as the time draws near, many feelings flood my heart. I dread the results, and yet I can't hardly wait for them. I'm constantly looking at my belly in the mirror wondering if it looks different. I'm constantly analyzing my body and trying to decide if anything really feels different. One day I think maybe I'm a little nauseated, the next day I'm a little extra tired. Then I throw it all aside and bitterly exclaim that it won't matter because I'm probably not pregnant anyways. Then five minutes later I'm noting that my dreams have been more strange than usual. 

So I wait, I wait for my fertile time, then I wait for enough time to pass so I can take a test, then I agonize over when exactly to take a test, then I'm disappointed and the whole waiting cycle starts over again. I'm tired of waiting. I'm so weary of wondering and hoping and not knowing. Then a verse came to mind. 

"They that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength, they will mount up on wings like eagles. They will run and not be weary, they will walk and not be faint." 

What's He talking about? I am WEARY! Then I noticed that it didn't say that those who wait on conception will renew their strength. It didn't say that those who wait on a husband will renew their strength. It said that those who wait ON THE LORD will renew their strength. It occurred to me that this whole life that God has given us is nothing but one big waiting game. But what are we waiting for really? If we are constantly waiting on the things we think will give us earthly satisfaction we will just continue to wear ourselves out. If we wait on JESUS though, He gives us strength. He sustains, and He satisfies, like nothing else will. 

So this month I think I will let that dreaded day come and go and whatever the results, I will remember who I'm really waiting on, and look to Him for strength and renewal to keep the faith and keep trucking on through the next month, and the next, and the next, and the next....

He Is Better

Hello Again!

The last few weeks have been a whirlwind. The good news is that Bruce and I finally found a new place. The bad news is, now we have to pack up and find furniture to fill our new TWO bedroom apartment. What a blessing! Through all the struggles and frustrations of looking for a new apartment, God taught me a lesson. I thought it was hard enough to be going through all the newly-wed challenges, plus apartment shopping and then add a little homesickness and you have a big mess. That is what I was. My husband is so patient!

So after we pulled through all of that and finally found a place, my husband showed me this video.
Matt Chandler was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor three years ago and was given three years to live. It's been three years and he's still alive. That is beside the point. His attitude towards this shocking news is simply this: Thank you God! Thank you for considering me worthy to display your goodness and your excellence and your glory in THIS. Not just when miracles are happening and we are blessed, but even when things are terrible and don't FEEL good, YOU ARE STILL GOOD!

He spoke about Hebrews 11 and how so many are commended for their faith. At the end he talks about  those who shut the mouths of lions, and who overcame terrible odds, but then it says some were beaten, some were shipwrecked, some were sawn in two and both groups of people showed great faith.

First of all, wow are my little trials BEANS compared to how people have suffered for Christ or what? Secondly, not everyone gets miracles and blessings all the time. Sometimes we suffer. I want be known as someone whose faith withstands the trials that come. I want to be able to stand up and say God is good, and excellent and beautiful and glorious no matter what the circumstances may be. I want to be able to say that God is sufficient, God is BETTER even than any thing, any circumstance, any ache or pain that there is in this world.

I also read an article in Table Talk magazine this week that spoke about pursuing contentment. It was dealing with the issue of covetousness, and how the heart issue is contentment. I have been so guilty lately, not of covetousness, but just of wallowing in my little list of things I wish were different. Um, Maria, THINGS AREN'T DIFFERENT!!! And you can't change them. You can only change YOU. That change that I need, it's contentment. So I've been on a crusade to pursue contentment. What a change it has made. How much more joy there is in life when you just choose to be thankful.

I sure do miss home....but I have the best husband in the whole world. So instead of being mopey because things here are different and mom and dad are far away, I choose to look at my hubby and let the goodness of the Lord fill my heart like wind in an open sail.

p.s  Here is a little preview of my wedding pics courtesy of Mark Elkins Photography.

There's a lot of love here :) 

Still Not Home

Still Not Home

White, and wispy all at once, she saw it coming fast

planning, working, calling, making, hoping she would last.

Then it came, and she emerged in white from head to toe.

Veil blown by balmy breezes, bright and all aglow.

She looked him in the eyes, she felt her spirit soar.

Home never felt this close before.

That white and wispy dream it carried her so long.

It buzzed and rang inside her ears like a lovely ringing song.

Day after day the song wore off, and then she faced her life.

She was happy cooking, cleaning, being a little wife.

I must be home, she thought, and sat down with a sigh.

But something in her yearned and longed, and made her want to cry.

The days grew long, and sometimes dull, the wispy dream had left.

She felt a little lonely, a little bit bereft.

Perhaps something was missing to make a home out of her house,

Perhaps she needed time to find her place, 

and get to know her spouse.

But time went on and on and on, she knew that wasn't true.

There was no thing, no time, no spouse

 that could stop her feeling blue.

No place, no person, nothing here on earth could fill and satisfy.

No place would ever fill her heart, and stop the need to cry.

No apartment, house or hut could make her feel at rest.

No roof would satisfy the longing that weighed upon her chest.

The only thing, she realized, that would fill her to the brim,

Would be when she saw God and went to her eternal home with Him.

Life Goes On...

Apartments, friends, feelings, schedules, routines.

These are all things that I am discovering, learning, searching for and understanding in my new life here.

Apartments. My husband and I have been searching diligently for an apartment. It is so difficult to find the line between being good stewards of our money and yet finding somewhere we can feel at home. We don't mind living somewhere that isn't the nicest place, but we would like a place where we don't wake up in the middle of the night because the roaches are having a party in our kitchen, you know?

Friends. Thank you Lord for letting me move nearby my sister. what an amazing blessing that has been. However, when you move to a knew place, you want to find connections, people you will see on a regular basis. In Morehead, I had Lambeth, of course, but I also had other friends that i'd run into at Wal-Mart, I new my hairdresser really well, and had other people that knew me around town. I want that community feeling here. I want my butcher to smile when he sees me coming, and I want to find my regular hair salon. I want to run into friends in the grocery store and when I'm on a walk. I want community. This takes time, and I'm not a very patient person. Yet, He is always faithful to provide, so I don't have to worry about it.

Feelings. So many new feelings. Homesickness comes in waves but less frequently now. Joy is constant. Happiness I feel whenever my hubby is in sight. Contentment fluctuates but increases with time. I am struggling with selfishness now more than I ever have. I never knew how spoiled I was until I got married. I have been shocked at how often I find myself upset and when I analyze it realize that I'm just not getting my way. God give me grace! And he does. Frustration and inadequacy come fairly often. Learning new roads, new stores, new everything can be frustrating, but at least they speak English here. I can't imagine what it's like for a new missionary transitioning into a whole new culture. Inadequacy I have always struggled with. My husband does such a lovely job of lifting me up and reminding me of the gifts God has given me. He also reminds me that it is GOD'S SPIRIT in me that does all the good and not me by myself.

Schedule and routines. This will come with time as I learn what my husband needs from me and what I need to accomplish during the day for my house and for my Herbalism program. No! I haven't abandoned it. I'm still working at it. And all of this comes with a need to learn how to balance my activities with the distraction of constantly available internet. I'll get used to it. I did in college.

Thank you Lord for helping me, and indwelling me with your Spirit, so that I might not lose hope and lose strength.

As the sun is full of light, 

the ocean full of water, 

Heaven full of glory, so my heart be full of thee.

Give me thyself without measure, 

as an unimpaired fountain, 

as inexhaustible riches. 

Come as love, that I may adore the Father, and love him as my all;

Come as joy, to dwell in me, move in me, animate me;

Come as helper, with strength to bless and keep, directing my every step;

Come as beautifier, bringing order out of confusion, loveliness out of chaos;

Magnify to me thy glory by being magnified in me, 

and make me redolent of thy fragrance.

Amen

~ From a puritan prayer

Dinners for Two

Hello friends!

A new challenge has presented itself in my new married life: cooking for two! I have spent the last fifteenish years cooking for anywhere from 4 -16+ people. I was not sure how I could reprogram my brain to cook less. I find myself buying large amounts of food, dividing it into portions and freezing it. It's kind of like being in college again. That was a three year window where I cooked for one! Although there were times then that I cooked for a lot more than that. Some of you may remember the famous Friday night dinners. So I find myself making little pots of soup, and chopping pork loins into four big chunks. It's kind of fun making a meal and then seeing if there's any left over. Tonight I made roasted pork loin with a pineapple glaze and a side of fresh steamed green beans and mashed potatoes. Yum! I can't wait to eat it :)

Here's a little how-to for roasted pork loin for two!

1. Take a full sized pork loin (1.79 a lb at Kroger this week!!) and chop it into four large pieces about four to five inches long. Freeze three pieces and save one out. 
2. Place the piece you saved out in a pressure cooker pot with olive oil, sprinkle it with seasoned salt and garlic powder and brown it. 
3. Then put the rack in the pressure cooker and 1 1/2 of water and a little salt. Put the lid on the cooker and bring it to full pressure. Cook it for about 12 minutes in a manual pressure cooker, 10 in an electric one.
4. Meanwhile, place three finely chopped rings of canned pineapple in a small saute pan and add a tablespoon of brown sugar and 1/4 tsp of fresh grated ginger. Add two tablespoons of water and simmer for a few minutes until thickened.
5. Let your pressure cooker fully release the pressure before you open it. Open it then and slice the pork loin, put it back in the cooker to stay warm.
6. Place fresh, rinsed and snapped beans into a steamer pot and steam for twenty minutes with salted water. Top with a couple pats of butter...VOILA! Delicious dinner for two :) Enjoy! 

Are We Home Yet?

Dear friends,
       I feel as though I've been here for an eternity now and I keep wondering when I'm going to have to pack up and go home. Then the reality hits me that I AM home. The trouble is, it doesn't quite feel like home yet. For one thing, all my books, beloved stationary, fountain pen, odds and ends are still in a storage unit. I daren't unpack them because in six weeks or so I'll have to pack them again. That's right, I'm moving again. Our lease is up December 1st and we're off to a slightly larger place. One where I might just have room to set up a legitimate pantry or a craft area. One where the kitchen is not also the living room, and the bedroom.  
It's not easy to be trying to settle and not settle too much at the same time. I want to be home. I yearn to be home, and yet I must wait.
     This waiting puts me in mind of the verse that says

"Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head." Matthew 8:20

  Where was I? Oh yeah, I think I was complaining about not feeling at home yet in this cozy apartment with a memory foam mattress topper and luxurious pillow.....how embarrassing. I can't believe that I would even begin to feel sorry for myself when Jesus himself had NOWHERE to lay his head that was his own. He had NOWHERE that he could call home. He slept outside, under the stars, and in the cold. He spent his days giving, giving, and giving until he exhausted himself. I spend my days working, staying busy, yes, but also whining and complaining a lot. 
      So my goal right now is not to focus on not being home quite yet, but on my home with Bruce. It's not the place really that is home, but the people. I don't really miss Morehead City or the beach as much as I miss Mom and Dad, Paul, and Grandmother. So I need to fill that bit of loneliness with my new home, my new family, Bruce. How can I adjust my heart, my emotions, my mindset to feel more at home with him? This is the question I intend to explore and answer. Stay tuned to find out my progress. Love to all! MG 

    

A New Name, A New Life

Dear Friends,

      I am now no longer Maria Lorraine McNiel. YES it's true, I got married! I am now Maria Lorraine Goff. And OH, how I love it! So I thought I would continue my blog as a married woman now. Exploring the challenges of being a stay at home wife in the big city. I haven't gotten quite used to using a dishwasher AND a dryer yet. I do miss hanging out the laundry.
     But oh there are so many JOYS in being a wife. My husband delights in all the little things I do. Everything is like a little gift to him. The things that were routine to my family are so new and exciting to him. When I take out his shirt in the evening and iron it for the next day. When I greet him with dinner ready. When I tidy up the house and when I do the laundry. Each thing just gives him joy and thus giving me joy as well.
     I am learning also that missing home is not bad. Grief of this kind is not so despairing. It is merely one's heart separating itself from what it was knit to before and re-knitting itself to a new family. Tearing and repairing can be a mite painful. But it will not last forever. There are things I miss about home, besides hanging out clothes of course. I miss the water. I miss afternoons sitting in my parents room rehashing the days events. I miss getting breakfast ready with my dad in the mornings, and hearing his talk radio when I got in the kitchen. I miss my grandmother shuffling around the house and telling me for the seventeenth time that she doesn't know what she'd do without me. Yes, I miss these things. I miss exercising with Lambeth in the mornings and meeting up with her for Bible studies. However, I do not long to have them back. It is merely a letting go, a saying goodbye that hurts.
     When I begin to wax sad, I simply think of my husband. I think of his delight in me, the joy I have in helping him, and the joy of being in his arms and belonging to him, and the sadness seems to fade away. I have much to be thankful for. I can hardly wait to see where this journey will take my husband and me. Stay tuned to find out!

 P.S. Here is a picture from our wedding day, and the picture of the twins I promised ;)

Such a beautiful day in my life!

This is a couple weeks after they were born. They are now six months old.

 So yes, I am now a Texan. I live here in the big city, a country mouse trying to find her way. More to come! ~ Mrs. Maria Goff

Nanny McNiel

Hello All,
Yep, I've been making the 'rounds again. Here I am in Chicago, its almost midnight and I'm wondering why I'm still awake. Next to me swinging gently and smacking his lips while he sleeps is my new nephew, Asher Monroe McNiel, and not far away is his sister, Genevieve Elaine McNiel. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the twins have finally arrived. We waited SO long and they are here. I do not yet have a picture to post, but I will as soon as I can. OH how I love newborns. Their soft, velvety heads and sweet milky breath. Nothing really makes you see God more clearly then holding a tiny new born, hearing their heartbeat, feeling their breath and realizing that He created this little being out of nothing. He spoke and it was there. He knit them together in the womb. What a God we serve!

So I start to wax a little homesick, but then I remember how blessed I am. I remember what great siblings I have and what a joy it is to serve them. I love being a nanny, whether it is to my family or to my newest little friend Vivian. Meanwhile I tuck my own little mothering hopes and dreams away and give them to God. He knows my heart so well. How grateful I am for such wonderful training that I have had in the art of maternal love. Therefore I rejoice and am glad, YEA and I will rejoice!

Courtship 101

Hello out there!

Sorry that I've been so remiss in my posts. As it turns out, my life has been very full as of late. A new character has entered the scene. Here is my new friend. His name is Bruce Goff:

My new friend is also my suitor. I thought I'd give you all a little information on what courtship is all about. Courtship is the process of getting to know someone in order to decide whether or not you'd like to marry them. The young man approaches the father of a young lady and asks to spend time with her. The father spends some time getting to know the young man to discern whether or not he is prepared for marriage, suitable for his daughter, prepared for family leadership etc. Once the "vetting" is done, the father may or may not grant permission depending on how his conversations with the young man go. In my case, my dad said yes and invited Bruce for Christmas. After spending more time together, if the young man is still interested, he may then ask the father to "court" this means to intentionally set aside time to spend with the girl to further confirm his interest and then to persuade her. I need to stop here and put in a disclaimer that courtship varies from one family to the next and this is how it looks for me and my family. So Bruce and I have now been getting to know each other for a little over a month. All the big questions have been answered and now we are just developing our friendship and getting to know each other better. To some this may sound like arranged marriage or downright crazy, but it is SO much better than dating. How many girls go out with a guy only to find out that he is some creep that just wants to take advantage of you? That does not happen with courtship because the guy has to go through the dad first. How many guys get in a relationship and then want to get married but have to wait exorbitant amounts of time because he has no savings or job? This again does not happen in courtship. Courtship is getting to know someone for the right reasons, with the right things in line in your life, and having people watch out for you while you do it. Its that simple.

Bruce and I are enjoying this process, and hope to be an example to other people and to bring glory to God. So that is where I've been and who I've been with. The end.

Passing Seasons

What is it about the season that gets us so excited and in a flutter, only to come crashing down when its all over? Holidays are like a drug. They give us an unnatural high in which we revel the daylong. Suddenly, without warning, we come crashing down with a headache and a heartache.

I am a victim of this drug. For weeks I baked and cooked and decorated. I shopped and wrapped with care and dreamt of the smiles that would appear from said gifts. I yearned for the family and anticipated the dear friends. Then all at once it was upon me. Trips to the airport were made, and bedrooms were filled. Soon we were laughing and singing and eating like crazy. I enjoyed every minute of it. Even being woken in the night by a crying baby at 4 am. I relished it.

My sister and her husband and their ADORABLE baby were with us for ten glorious days. My friend, Bruce, came for four. We all had such a fantastic time. I can’t begin to tell you all the good times we had. Between our new stove, Javier’s new gun, Granny’s fruitcake and Abigail’s little washer machine, it was a perfect Christmas. We sang the most beautiful song at the candlelight service on Christmas Eve. We ate the most delectable foods. We played games and went on walks and talked until we all collapsed each night with exhaustion.

Then one day I woke up, and we packed everyone in the car, and they were gone. Everyone. Suddenly my house was empty. There were sheets to wash, and a refrigerator that looked like World War II. When I said my farewells at the airport, I felt okay. I was still feeling the residual giddiness from the week. When I got home, I thought I would be sick. It was all over. Somehow, I found the energy to undecorate the tree and strip the beds. I felt bereft and depressed.

I needed some TLC. I was just so blue and tired. It was, after all, New Years Eve. Mom and Dad had plans, and Granny had plans, and my plans were up in the air. I went to go take care of some Internet business and then just sporadically decided to take a walk on the beach. My heart was so full. As I walked, the Lord enveloped me in His love. He game me a spectacular sunset with which to say good-bye to the old year. He gave me encouragement from His Word, which I had brought along. I was uplifted. When I got home, I had just what I needed: confirmed plans, a quiet house to myself, a frozen pizza, and a chick flick. After my film I joined some fantastic friends for a Twilight Zone marathon, and rang in the New Year watching a crab pot drop downtown with my community. It was perfect. It was just what I needed.

The Lord sees that we are dust. He sees that we are so desperately weak. He knows my frame, and when I feel that the slightest breeze will crack me into a thousand pieces, He finds the gentlest way to whisper His love to me, and remind me that though the season has changed, and though my friends and family have returned home, He is still God, and He never changes. For someone who has SUCH a hard time with change, THAT is a comforting thought. ☺

Malachi 3:6a “ For I am the Lord, I change not…”

What is a Doula?

Dear friends,
Since I have decided that I want to pursue being a Doula after my Herbalism Program is complete, I decided to shed a little light on what a Doula really is. In the past, I have had a hard time explaining to people what a Doula is exactly. I did a little research last week, and have found out some very good things that I can share with y'all.

1) Doula comes from Ancient Greek δούλη (doulē) meaning "female slave." (this is from Wikipedia). In other words, a Doula serves as sort of a "lady-in-waiting" for the pregnant mother.

2) A Doula is a "birth companion" of sorts that helps a mother with everything from doing research and making informed decisions for her labor plan, to be there to support her and help her through her labor. She assists with breast feeding and post partum recovery.

I hope this helps !

Journey West to be completed Later...But for now...

Hello all,
SOO as it turns out, my computer is having issues and so I am not able to post the rest of my pictures from my Journey West. The rest included Vegas, Grand Canyon, Crater Lake, Seattle, and Vancouver Island. It was a beautiful time and it was pure joy to see a very dear friend, Bjorn Stime marry his lovely bride.

Life has been moving right along here on the East coast. Since I arrived back on this side of the country I started working at Carteret Community College. I am an English tutor. I man the "Language Lab." People needing help with Enlish homework, grammar or writing papers come to me for help. Otherwise I just sit in here and work on my own stuff. Right now I'm learning how to knit socks. I will post a picture of my completed sock when I finish it. It is NOT easy. I had to rip out the heel and do it four times. I really enjoy knitting though which is a new developement. I've always been kind of a crochet type of gal.

My herbalism program is coming along. I'm supposed to finish lesson 11 today and 12 by the end of this week. I'd better get crackin'. Right now i'm practicing doing health analysis and evaluation on people. I did one on myself, a friend, and now I've got to finish one for a family member. I find it extremely exciting to look at someone's health history, family history, current symptoms and issues and to do research to find out what nutrients in foods, supplements and botanicals can help them. I love it. I absolutely can't wait, however, until I finish this and start working on my Doula certification. That is my real passion. I love pregnancy and everything about. I love ministering to pregnant women. I like reading about and developing botanical medicines and treatments for them. My latest project was a sitz bath mixture for post-partum healing. I got some ideas from my instructor, Mrs. Shonda Parker, and then also from another herbal company. Here is what I put in the mixture:

Post-Partum Sitz Bath:
I used Equal parts of
Comfrey leaf
Plantain Leaf
Lavendar Flowers
Chamomile Flowers
Calendula Flowers
St. Johns Wort
Arnica Flowers

Then I filled the rest of the bag up with Sea Salt. The finished product filled up a gallon zip-lock bag.

This isn't my mixture, but I thought it was a nice idea to put it in a mason jar and you could even tie a little ribbon around it!

I gave this and some other pregnancy goodies to a friend of mine for her baby shower. I've also made homemade Baby Bum Balm, and Baby Powder. I get most of my herbs from www.bulkherbstore.com and www.morethanalive.com they are great resources!

Other than that folks, i'm busy with my granny, with my family, cleaning my house using the AMAZING flylady system, and walking the beauiful Carolina beaches. Holiday preperations have begun. Stand-by for great recipe's and homemade gift ideas. See ya!

Maria's Journey West, Part 2: Family Joy

So After I left Atlanta, I had a great opportunity to discuss my views of marriage with a Greek man on the plane. I was glad that it was fresh on my mind, due to my late night post just hours before. When I got to Albuquerque I was so excited. I knew that my sister was getting there around the same time. I love her baby!!! She is the cutest. SO anyhow, she and her hubby got there about a half-hour later, and we all piled in the car to head to Nani and Tata's house. Nani and Tata are my mom's parents. We drove up and in seconds were enveloped in hugs and kisses from my sweet grandparents, brother, sister-in-law and sweet nieces. What JOY!!! Minutes later we were whisked off to a beautiful sunny park where we waited for admittance into our rental house. As we sat under a big tree and laughed, snacked, and played with the babies, I thought about how wonderfully blessed I was. Dad and Paul joined us and we were soon walking around and exploring our new little "casa."
The house was a little adobe place with an unmistakeable southwestern feel. It was complete with a lion claw bath tub and nice outdoor patio. It was perfect for us. We had the best time. Being with my sisters, my brothers and nieces was like heaven for me. However, for the first time in my life, I felt lonely in my own family. Mom and Dad had eachother, each of my siblings has their little family unit, and Paul had some friends in town. I felt a little alone, and found that I had alot of time to myself. I poured this time into reviewing a young adult sci-fi novel for a friend of mine. I enjoyed the idea of reading with a critical eye. I think reviewing books may be something I might enjoy doing in the future. So it was a quiet and a peaceful time. There were days, however,that were busy and full. The day we threw my Nani's birthday party was one of those.
My Nani turned 80, and as always with the Baca's, we had to have a big party. It was a HUGE success. We had music, dancing, great food, and lots of family. I've learned a lot of things from my Nani, but the most important thing I think I've learned from her is to enjoy life. She enjoys every minute of every day. I want to be like that. I want to be positive and enjoy the lonely times as well as the busy times. I want to thank God for every circumstance. Spending time with my family was just pure joy.

P.S. Pictures to come...

Maria's Cross Country Journey Part 1: Change

The first leg of my journey is in Atlanta. I've been here since Wednesday. My friend Ali got married today-actually yesterday I guess, and I was a bridesmaid. It was a flurry of preparations, and activity. However, the weekend was a HUGE success. Amazing food, exciting venues, people and events made this an extremely memorable time for me. I will admit, it was not easy watching yet another one of my friends get married, nor was it easy to see yet another one of my best friends move far away. I've never been good with change. Yet there were other feelings I experienced as I performed my bridesmaidenly duties this weekend.

I've been to many weddings in my life. Some were exciting, somewhere dull. There were some that have left me still scratching my head. As a whole, I would say that I enjoy weddings. The romance, the righteousness, to me its a constant reminder of God's love for me. Its a beautiful picture of what Christ has done for us. People get so worked up about marriage. They wonder what the point is. Marriage is no longer necessary for intimacy and procreation; it's no longer necessary for companionship or for the good of society. Why get married? It is an unnecessary step on the path to a happy and care-free relationship.

Marriage means that you have to answer to someone else, that they own part of you. Marriage means that you can never go out with anyone again, and that your social life is basically over. This is what society at large thinks. They don't see it. Yes, it is hard. Yes, you do have to give things up, yes its painful at times and yes it is sacrifice. That my friends is the beauty of the thing. It is Christ. It is him give His life for us. It is Him being beaten and abused for our benefit. He didn't do it because of what He could get out of it. He didn't do it because of some fuzzy feelings He had about humanity. He did it because God commanded it. He did it out of obedience. Marriage is obedience. You might tilt your head to the side and say, "Well God never commands us to be married." You're right, He doesn't. But He tells us to love over and over and over again. THEN He paints all these amazing pictures of the bride waiting for her bridegroom, preparing herself for his arrival. Suddenly it becomes clear. Marriage is this incredible gift that we have been given to show people active, concrete Gospel. To show people sacrifice, selfless love, redemption, and obedience. We marry because we want others to see Him, and because we want to bring glory to God.

So as I put on my bridesmaids dress today, and curled my hair, and walked down the aisle, I thought about being the last of my college friends to marry. I thought about how my best friend Ali was getting married and moving away. But as I lay trying to sleep tonight, I thought about Jesus, and what He did for me. I thought about how many people would come into contact with Ben and Ali and see Christ through their marriage. I thought about how many children they might have that will also, God willing, bear the name of Christ and bring Him to others. So I hope that some people who grumble about marriage or are marriage cynics will have seen this wedding today and will understand that pain and sacrifice is what makes love, forgiveness, and mercy shine so much brighter. I hope they will see a picture that looks like a human, giving His life and suffering, so that someone else might live.

And thus the first leg of my journey comes to a close. I left "Cabbage Town" yesterday morning and I leave Atlanta in about eight hours. I will never forget this weekend, and I hope that I'll never forget what an unbelievable gift I have been given from God.

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:38-39

Long Lapse

Yikes!
So its been a long time since I last blogged. I haven't blogged literally all summer. Well its been a busy one, let me tell you. I have visited the Hernandez family and I intend to blog about protesting at the abortion clinic, I visited my new DEAR friend Cara Jones, and i'll have a whole post about her too, and we had my grandparents here for two weeks. I feel like there is so much more but I can't remember all that has gone on. Now I am in the midst of preparing for my LONG JOURNEY across the west. I will start out at my dear friend Ali's Wedding, and then follow that up with a family reunion in Albuquerque NM. Then from there i'll be driving up to Vancouver for a wedding by way of Salt Lake City UT as well as Northern California, Seattle and Portland. Its gonna be great so stay tuned. I also have to recipe posts coming up- one for face cream, and the other for strawberry rhubarb pie. Lots to come, God Bless ~ Maria

Puttin' Up Strawberries

Howdy out there,
Well life has been a little crazy here on the East coast, go figure. I just got back from a whirlwind trip to Atlanta to visit my dear friend from college. We picked out bridesmaid dresses for her upcoming wedding in August, and spent some time getting reacquainted with one another. Its amazing how you can keep in touch with someone through letters, phone calls etc., and still not be aware of all the changes going on in and around them until you are physically with them. I have never dealt well with change, so it was difficult for me to process all the changes and understand where she is and how she got there. However, I serve a merciful God, and through all my melancholy, tactless blunders and emotional spasms, God gave us a sweet and memorable time together.

I promise, I WILL get to the strawberries...

Two more things to note:
1) I recently saw the latest adaptation of Charlotte Bronte's, "Jane Eyre," and was sorely disappointed. Apparently, (according to the afore mentioned friend's fiance)literary critics consider the portion of the story surrounding Jane Eyre's cousins to be unrealistic and disconnected with the rest of the story. This is because they view Jane Eyre as an independent woman striving out into the world to proclaim her independence and her will to be free from any master. This is a feminist viewpoint which is not only inaccurate but also offensive. How dare they turn a such a deep meaningful story about a woman's search for love and righteousness into a story about a search for independence! Jane Eyre is a love deprived person who wants nothing else in the world but love and familial connections. She feels a void in her latter days at school and seeks to fill it by finding a governess position. She is not seeking a career, she is just trying to find out what the ache and longing is within her and is under the impression that she will be joined with a family this way. She is forced to leave there against everything that she feels. She wants to be tied forever to Mr. Rochester, but she leaves because she knows that she will answer to God for her actions if she does not. When, with St. Jean, she finds out that she is a rich woman, she ALSO FINDS OUT SHE IS INDEED RELATED TO HIM AND HIS SISTERS! She weeps with this discovery, She is SO happy to finally have found what she was looking for. She never wanted independence. She wanted love. Alright, I'm off my soapbox now.

2) I recently made my own skin care line: cleansing grains and moisturizer. I will post pictures and such very soon. I have not yet made a toner.

OK FINALLY! What you've all been waiting for, the first glimpse into my 2011 canning season. It has begun!

All of my materials gathered and clean. We're ready to start!

Beautiful berries, rinsed and ready for the sauce pan.

Boiling berries, filling the house with a heavenly smell.

Putting it in the jars is tricky. Not boiling your fingers off is the key.

The finished product!

See folks, not as hard as you thought! More to come....

Maria

God the Father, My Ever Present Help In Time of Need

Hello Dear Friends,
Easter has passed, and now the balmy, glorious days of Spring melt into Summer. As I type this I am sitting beneath a full Oak tree enjoying a cool breeze and watching the motorboats whiz by in the Bogue Sound. I have been dwelling lately on the sacrifice of Christ, but even more on the sacrifice of the Father. On Good Friday, my parents and I joined a group of people from the Methodist church in an evening worship service. To our surprise the service was a simple reading out of the King James Version of the Bible, the passion of Christ. As we read the scriptures, the whole congregation rose and followed the pastor out as he and some men carried a cross down the highway and through our neighborhood to a park. There they erected the cross and there we continued the story. I pictured Him hanging there and tears streamed down my face. I saw the depths of my sin hanging on his shoulders and marveled at why he would do such a thing for me. It was all very moving. Christ sacrificed much for me, but the Father sacrificed even more. I thing about my sister and her new baby. Could anything in this world induce her to take the life of her own baby? Could anything make her freely give her to death and then watch her suffer? It is ludicrous to think that she would ever do such a thing, but God did. He gave His only son. He watched Him suffer and finally turned away. He watched them beat Him senseless and spit in His face. He watched Him bear the sin of the world. For me. For us. How can I now know this and yet continue to allow things in my life that I know do not bring me closer to Him? How can I still hang on to the things of this world? How can I daily forget this love and push Him aside so that I can get to my checklist that is oh so much more important? Help me Lord to forsake the world, to turn from all and seek only to love and please You. Let me not forget the work that you did. Let me not forget how you gave your son. Let me never doubt that you love me. Amen.

Spring At Last

Last night there was a warm shower of rain, a golden sunset, a beautiful rainbow blazened across the evening sky and flowers positively everywhere. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Spring has finally sprung in North Carolina. There is no time more beautiful in this state. Azaleas are in bloom, Dogwoods are in bloom, Red Buds, and Crocuses are in bloom. Everywhere you turn is a burst of color and breath of warm, fragrant, balmy air. Birds are chirping their lungs off. Its pretty amazing! This time of year takes me back to our farmhouse. It makes me think of Dad digging the grass and weeds up for his huge garden, the rooster yelling is head of at 4AM, and my sister and I picking strawberries and preserving them. It reminds me of getting up early and baking all day long and then packaging until the wee hours of the night, only to get up at 5am the next morning and head downtown to sell our wares. I miss you vange. This time of year also starts me thinking about cutting down on the heavy casseroles and soups and getting into more fresh fish and crisp salads. Here is a lovely cold salad recipe. I hope you like it!

Ingredients
1 pouch (4.5 oz.) StarKist Tuna Creations®, Zesty Lemon Pepper
1 garlic clove
1 Tbsp. lemon juice
2 Tbsp. olive oil
1 can (16 oz.) Cannellini beans, drained and rinsed
½ red pepper cut in cubes
¼ cup chopped red onion
Fresh Basil, chopped, to taste
Salt and pepper, to taste
Directions
Mince garlic and mash to a paste with the back of a spoon. Mix garlic paste with lemon juice, salt and pepper and slowly whisk in olive oil.
Toss red pepper, onion, and beans together.
Break apart tuna and mix in to bean mixture.
Add dressing and toss well. Add basil just before serving. Serve at room temperature.
....